Thread: Stupid, stupid, stupid. . .

On Sep 27, 12:09*pm, Janet Bostwick <nos...@cableone.net> wrote:
> I want to smoke a turkey this weekend. *I have a 12 pounder and it is
> thawed, so today is the day to begin brining it.
> I got the brine made and cooled. *I've only brined a turkey during
> late fall and winter and was able to put the bird in the cooler out on
> the deck for the duration. *I can't do that now. *It's too warm.
> I was sure that the bird would fit in one of those 2 1/2 gallon zip
> bags along with the brine -- just the way that you would do a roast or
> a steak. *Well, it does fit in the bag and so does brine. *But when
> you close the bag, half of the turkey sticks up out of the brine.
> S**T!!! So. . . I have a big deep bowl, I thought I would put the bird
> and brine there --dammit! some of the bird still sticks out of the
> brine (did I mention that I am now wearing half the brine and the
> counters are awash with it?) *I finally decided on a bucket. *That
> works pretty much o.k., except for a generous Pope's nose up in the
> air..
> I was so intent on getting the damn turkey brined and refrigerated
> that I forgot that my second surgery for my damaged rotator cuff
> didn't work either. (means I can't raise my right arm above low
> horizontal) How I got that bucket full of bird and brine into the
> fridge, I can't remember. *I only know that I am off to take a shower
> and change clothes and then I will come back and mop the floor.
> *I had the whole thing planned out in my head. *I think that bothers
> me more than anything that it didn't work out to plan.
> Janet US

Hate it when that kinda stuff happens- I hope you didn't do more
damage to your RC. I injured mine about 6 months ago, and it took a
long time to feel better- I still get occasional twinges...

On Thu, 27 Sep 2012 13:09:41 -0600, Janet Bostwick wrote:

> I want to smoke a turkey this weekend. I have a 12 pounder and it is
> thawed, so today is the day to begin brining it.
> I got the brine made and cooled. I've only brined a turkey during
> late fall and winter and was able to put the bird in the cooler out on
> the deck for the duration. I can't do that now. It's too warm.
> I was sure that the bird would fit in one of those 2 1/2 gallon zip
> bags along with the brine -- just the way that you would do a roast or
> a steak. Well, it does fit in the bag and so does brine. But when
> you close the bag, half of the turkey sticks up out of the brine.

Even if you suck all the air out of the bag? You should have enough
coverage that way, just rotate the bag every once in a while.

-sw

On Sep 27, 12:24*pm, Sqwertz <swe...@cluemail.compost> wrote:
> On Thu, 27 Sep 2012 13:09:41 -0600, Janet Bostwick wrote:
> > I want to smoke a turkey this weekend. *I have a 12 pounder and it is
> > thawed, so today is the day to begin brining it.
> > I got the brine made and cooled. *I've only brined a turkey during
> > late fall and winter and was able to put the bird in the cooler out on
> > the deck for the duration. *I can't do that now. *It's too warm.
> > I was sure that the bird would fit in one of those 2 1/2 gallon zip
> > bags along with the brine -- just the way that you would do a roast or
> > a steak. *Well, it does fit in the bag and so does brine. *But when
> > you close the bag, half of the turkey sticks up out of the brine.
>
> Even if you suck all the air out of the bag? *You should have enough
> coverage that way, just rotate the bag every once in a while.
>
> -sw

That's just way to complicated.

On Sep 27, 12:09*pm, Janet Bostwick <nos...@cableone.net> wrote:
> I want to smoke a turkey this weekend. *I have a 12 pounder and it is
> thawed, so today is the day to begin brining it.
> I got the brine made and cooled. *I've only brined a turkey during
> late fall and winter and was able to put the bird in the cooler out on
> the deck for the duration. *I can't do that now. *It's too warm.
> I was sure that the bird would fit in one of those 2 1/2 gallon zip
> bags along with the brine -- just the way that you would do a roast or
> a steak. *Well, it does fit in the bag and so does brine. *But when
> you close the bag, half of the turkey sticks up out of the brine.
> S**T!!! So. . . I have a big deep bowl, I thought I would put the bird
> and brine there --dammit! some of the bird still sticks out of the
> brine (did I mention that I am now wearing half the brine and the
> counters are awash with it?) *I finally decided on a bucket. *That
> works pretty much o.k., except for a generous Pope's nose up in the
> air..
> I was so intent on getting the damn turkey brined and refrigerated
> that I forgot that my second surgery for my damaged rotator cuff
> didn't work either. (means I can't raise my right arm above low
> horizontal) How I got that bucket full of bird and brine into the
> fridge, I can't remember. *I only know that I am off to take a shower
> and change clothes and then I will come back and mop the floor.
> *I had the whole thing planned out in my head. *I think that bothers
> me more than anything that it didn't work out to plan.
> Janet US

I'm so sorry for all your troubles Janet, but that whole scene has had
me laghing out loud.

I hope you can manage to see the humor in it a well !!!!

"Janet Bostwick" <nospa[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]..
>I want to smoke a turkey this weekend.

I've never tried that. Is it supposed to mellow you out? (From your
description, I guess not.)

On Thu, 27 Sep 2012 14:24:12 -0500, Sqwertz <[email protected]>
wrote:

>On Thu, 27 Sep 2012 13:09:41 -0600, Janet Bostwick wrote:
>
>> I want to smoke a turkey this weekend. I have a 12 pounder and it is
>> thawed, so today is the day to begin brining it.
>> I got the brine made and cooled. I've only brined a turkey during
>> late fall and winter and was able to put the bird in the cooler out on
>> the deck for the duration. I can't do that now. It's too warm.
>> I was sure that the bird would fit in one of those 2 1/2 gallon zip
>> bags along with the brine -- just the way that you would do a roast or
>> a steak. Well, it does fit in the bag and so does brine. But when
>> you close the bag, half of the turkey sticks up out of the brine.
>
>Even if you suck all the air out of the bag? You should have enough
>coverage that way, just rotate the bag every once in a while.
>
>-sw
You'd think so, wouldn't you? That's where you and I went wrong. A
turkey isn't flat, it has this big hump called a breast. It gets in
the way of squeezing all the air out and it also prevents brine
coverage when you turn the bird over. The only way I see that is
reliable for brining a turkey is vertically or literally swimming in
brine. I always do mine in one of those big Igloo cold water coolers.
The bird can swim in there and I can bungee cord the lid down so that
raccoons can't lift the lid.
Janet US

On Thu, 27 Sep 2012 12:45:53 -0700 (PDT), ImStillMags
<[email protected]> wrote:

>On Sep 27, 12:09*pm, Janet Bostwick <nos...@cableone.net> wrote:
>> I want to smoke a turkey this weekend. *I have a 12 pounder and it is
>> thawed, so today is the day to begin brining it.
snip
>> *I had the whole thing planned out in my head. *I think that bothers
>> me more than anything that it didn't work out to plan.
>> Janet US
>
>I'm so sorry for all your troubles Janet, but that whole scene has had
>me laghing out loud.
>
>I hope you can manage to see the humor in it a well !!!!

Yeah, I can appreciate the humor. I'd rather be a bystander in this
farce. )
Janet US

On Thu, 27 Sep 2012 14:39:42 -0600, Janet Bostwick wrote:

> On Thu, 27 Sep 2012 14:24:12 -0500, Sqwertz <[email protected]>
> wrote:
>
>>On Thu, 27 Sep 2012 13:09:41 -0600, Janet Bostwick wrote:
>>
>>> I want to smoke a turkey this weekend. I have a 12 pounder and it is
>>> thawed, so today is the day to begin brining it.
>>> I got the brine made and cooled. I've only brined a turkey during
>>> late fall and winter and was able to put the bird in the cooler out on
>>> the deck for the duration. I can't do that now. It's too warm.
>>> I was sure that the bird would fit in one of those 2 1/2 gallon zip
>>> bags along with the brine -- just the way that you would do a roast or
>>> a steak. Well, it does fit in the bag and so does brine. But when
>>> you close the bag, half of the turkey sticks up out of the brine.
>>
>>Even if you suck all the air out of the bag? You should have enough
>>coverage that way, just rotate the bag every once in a while.
>>
> You'd think so, wouldn't you? That's where you and I went wrong. A
> turkey isn't flat, it has this big hump called a breast. It gets in
> the way of squeezing all the air out and it also prevents brine
> coverage when you turn the bird over.

As long as all the air is out then the brine is technically covering
the turkey sufficiently. I have no trouble getting all the air out of
the bag. Either smash it flat against your chest as you close it, or
keep 1" of the bag open as you suck out the air (may use a straw if
you want). Then zip close as you suck.

Then there will be brine all the way up to the top of the bag, which
is taller than the turkey. It may be thinner up there, but that is
enough brine to brine a bird (or any awkward piece of meat). I have
done dozens of chickens this way in gallon bags and they turn out just
fine. Just squeeze and swish and turn the bag every time you go into
the fridge - every 4-6 hours is fine.

-sw

"ImStillMags" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> On Sep 27, 12:09 pm, Janet Bostwick <nos...@cableone.net> wrote:
>> I want to smoke a turkey this weekend. I have a 12 pounder and it is
>> thawed, so today is the day to begin brining it.
>> I got the brine made and cooled. I've only brined a turkey during
>> late fall and winter and was able to put the bird in the cooler out on
>> the deck for the duration. I can't do that now. It's too warm.
>> I was sure that the bird would fit in one of those 2 1/2 gallon zip
>> bags along with the brine -- just the way that you would do a roast or
>> a steak. Well, it does fit in the bag and so does brine. But when
>> you close the bag, half of the turkey sticks up out of the brine.
>> S**T!!! So. . . I have a big deep bowl, I thought I would put the bird
>> and brine there --dammit! some of the bird still sticks out of the
>> brine (did I mention that I am now wearing half the brine and the
>> counters are awash with it?) I finally decided on a bucket. That
>> works pretty much o.k., except for a generous Pope's nose up in the
>> air..
>> I was so intent on getting the damn turkey brined and refrigerated
>> that I forgot that my second surgery for my damaged rotator cuff
>> didn't work either. (means I can't raise my right arm above low
>> horizontal) How I got that bucket full of bird and brine into the
>> fridge, I can't remember. I only know that I am off to take a shower
>> and change clothes and then I will come back and mop the floor.
>> I had the whole thing planned out in my head. I think that bothers
>> me more than anything that it didn't work out to plan.
>> Janet US
>
> I'm so sorry for all your troubles Janet, but that whole scene has had
> me laghing out loud.
>
> I hope you can manage to see the humor in it a well !!!!

So do I!!! She had me laughing too!!! I just hope she hasn't done any
damage to that arm!

--
--

http://www.shop.helpforheroes.org.uk/

On Sep 27, 3:45*pm, ImStillMags <sitara8...@gmail.com> wrote:
> I hope you can manage to see the humor in it a well !!!!


You'd have died laughing if you'd seen me and my father rescuing a
thawed turkey in an elderly lady's utility room. This was in the
early 80s, but I cam recall a frozen door handle to the room, and me
and him trying to get in thru a window, a long pole to try to move a
barrel lock, me crawling thru the window, ...........never think that
a lockless door knob will always let you in.

On 9/27/2012 3:09 PM, Janet Bostwick wrote:
> I want to smoke a turkey this weekend. I have a 12 pounder and it is
> thawed, so today is the day to begin brining it.
> I got the brine made and cooled. I've only brined a turkey during
> late fall and winter and was able to put the bird in the cooler out on
> the deck for the duration. I can't do that now. It's too warm.
> I was sure that the bird would fit in one of those 2 1/2 gallon zip
> bags along with the brine -- just the way that you would do a roast or
> a steak. Well, it does fit in the bag and so does brine. But when
> you close the bag, half of the turkey sticks up out of the brine.
> S**T!!! So. . . I have a big deep bowl, I thought I would put the bird
> and brine there --dammit! some of the bird still sticks out of the
> brine (did I mention that I am now wearing half the brine and the
> counters are awash with it?) I finally decided on a bucket. That
> works pretty much o.k., except for a generous Pope's nose up in the
> air..
> I was so intent on getting the damn turkey brined and refrigerated
> that I forgot that my second surgery for my damaged rotator cuff
> didn't work either. (means I can't raise my right arm above low
> horizontal) How I got that bucket full of bird and brine into the
> fridge, I can't remember. I only know that I am off to take a shower
> and change clothes and then I will come back and mop the floor.
> I had the whole thing planned out in my head. I think that bothers
> me more than anything that it didn't work out to plan.
> Janet US
>

Why not just roast it? The regional chain had young unadulterated
turkeys on sale last week. They were frozen so it spent 3 days in the
fridge. I quartered an onion and put it in the cavity and it spent the
first 2/3s of the time breast sound down and then I flipped. It came out
juicy and with nice crisp skin.

On Thu, 27 Sep 2012 13:09:41 -0600, Janet Bostwick
<[email protected]> wrote:

>I want to smoke a turkey this weekend. I have a 12 pounder and it is
>thawed, so today is the day to begin brining it.
>I got the brine made and cooled. I've only brined a turkey during
>late fall and winter and was able to put the bird in the cooler out on
>the deck for the duration. I can't do that now. It's too warm.
>I was sure that the bird would fit in one of those 2 1/2 gallon zip
>bags along with the brine -- just the way that you would do a roast or
>a steak. Well, it does fit in the bag and so does brine. But when
>you close the bag, half of the turkey sticks up out of the brine.
>S**T!!! So. . . I have a big deep bowl, I thought I would put the bird
>and brine there --dammit! some of the bird still sticks out of the
>brine (did I mention that I am now wearing half the brine and the
>counters are awash with it?) I finally decided on a bucket. That
>works pretty much o.k., except for a generous Pope's nose up in the
>air..
>I was so intent on getting the damn turkey brined and refrigerated
>that I forgot that my second surgery for my damaged rotator cuff
>didn't work either. (means I can't raise my right arm above low
>horizontal) How I got that bucket full of bird and brine into the
>fridge, I can't remember. I only know that I am off to take a shower
>and change clothes and then I will come back and mop the floor.
> I had the whole thing planned out in my head. I think that bothers
>me more than anything that it didn't work out to plan.
>Janet US

Oh, what a kitchen tale of woe!

The only thing I can recommend is put it behind you, smile are the
damned goofiness of it all, and use it as good cooking story to share
with friends as you have shared it with us.

Boron

Sqwertz <[email protected]> wrote:
> On Thu, 27 Sep 2012 14:39:42 -0600, Janet Bostwick wrote:
>
>> On Thu, 27 Sep 2012 14:24:12 -0500, Sqwertz <[email protected]>
>> wrote:
>>
>>> On Thu, 27 Sep 2012 13:09:41 -0600, Janet Bostwick wrote:
>>>
>>>> I want to smoke a turkey this weekend. I have a 12 pounder and it
>>>> is thawed, so today is the day to begin brining it.
>>>> I got the brine made and cooled. I've only brined a turkey during
>>>> late fall and winter and was able to put the bird in the cooler
>>>> out on the deck for the duration. I can't do that now. It's too
>>>> warm.
>>>> I was sure that the bird would fit in one of those 2 1/2 gallon zip
>>>> bags along with the brine -- just the way that you would do a
>>>> roast or a steak. Well, it does fit in the bag and so does brine.
>>>> But when you close the bag, half of the turkey sticks up out of
>>>> the brine.
>>>
>>> Even if you suck all the air out of the bag? You should have enough
>>> coverage that way, just rotate the bag every once in a while.
>>>
>> You'd think so, wouldn't you? That's where you and I went wrong. A
>> turkey isn't flat, it has this big hump called a breast. It gets in
>> the way of squeezing all the air out and it also prevents brine
>> coverage when you turn the bird over.
>
> As long as all the air is out then the brine is technically covering
> the turkey sufficiently. I have no trouble getting all the air out of
> the bag. Either smash it flat against your chest as you close it, or
> keep 1" of the bag open as you suck out the air (may use a straw if
> you want). Then zip close as you suck.
>
> Then there will be brine all the way up to the top of the bag, which
> is taller than the turkey. It may be thinner up there, but that is
> enough brine to brine a bird (or any awkward piece of meat). I have
> done dozens of chickens this way in gallon bags and they turn out just
> fine. Just squeeze and swish and turn the bag every time you go into
> the fridge - every 4-6 hours is fine.
>
> -sw

You need a Vacmaster! I put it on a tilt so the front is higher which helps
keep liquid from escaping when the air is sucked out. Brines and marinades
penetrate much faster. A whole toikey wouldn't fit though.

On 9/27/2012 3:09 PM, Janet Bostwick wrote:

> brine (did I mention that I am now wearing half the brine and the
> counters are awash with it?) I finally decided on a bucket. That
> works pretty much o.k., except for a generous Pope's nose up in the
> air..
> I was so intent on getting the damn turkey brined and refrigerated
> that I forgot that my second surgery for my damaged rotator cuff
> didn't work either.

This is where I got nervous, I was afraid you re-injured yourself.

>(means I can't raise my right arm above low
> horizontal) How I got that bucket full of bird and brine into the
> fridge, I can't remember. I only know that I am off to take a shower
> and change clothes and then I will come back and mop the floor.
> I had the whole thing planned out in my head. I think that bothers
> me more than anything that it didn't work out to plan.

Isn't that the way with plans? (laugh) you got it done anyway.

nancy

Somebody aka Tom Ungvarsky <[email protected]> wrote:

[...]

Tell, us, Tom, why did you change your posting address? There must be a
reason. Surely it's not to avoid killfiles, is it? Hmmm?

On 9/27/2012 3:09 PM, Janet Bostwick wrote:
> I want to smoke a turkey this weekend. I have a 12 pounder and it is
> thawed, so today is the day to begin brining it.
> I got the brine made and cooled. I've only brined a turkey during
> late fall and winter and was able to put the bird in the cooler out on
> the deck for the duration. I can't do that now. It's too warm.
> I was sure that the bird would fit in one of those 2 1/2 gallon zip
> bags along with the brine -- just the way that you would do a roast or
> a steak. Well, it does fit in the bag and so does brine. But when
> you close the bag, half of the turkey sticks up out of the brine.
> S**T!!! So. . . I have a big deep bowl, I thought I would put the bird
> and brine there --dammit! some of the bird still sticks out of the
> brine (did I mention that I am now wearing half the brine and the
> counters are awash with it?) I finally decided on a bucket. That
> works pretty much o.k., except for a generous Pope's nose up in the
> air..
> I was so intent on getting the damn turkey brined and refrigerated
> that I forgot that my second surgery for my damaged rotator cuff
> didn't work either. (means I can't raise my right arm above low
> horizontal) How I got that bucket full of bird and brine into the
> fridge, I can't remember. I only know that I am off to take a shower
> and change clothes and then I will come back and mop the floor.
> I had the whole thing planned out in my head. I think that bothers
> me more than anything that it didn't work out to plan.
> Janet US
>
I think we all suffer from poor planning syndrome sometimes. I hope it
still works out! And OUCH on the rotator cuff.

On Thu, 27 Sep 2012 21:53:04 +0100, "Ophelia" <[email protected]>
wrote:

>
>
>"ImStillMags" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>news:[email protected]...
>> On Sep 27, 12:09 pm, Janet Bostwick <nos...@cableone.net> wrote:
>>> I want to smoke a turkey this weekend. I have a 12 pounder and it is
>>> thawed, so today is the day to begin brining it.
>>> I got the brine made and cooled. I've only brined a turkey during
>>> late fall and winter and was able to put the bird in the cooler out on
>>> the deck for the duration. I can't do that now. It's too warm.
>>> I was sure that the bird would fit in one of those 2 1/2 gallon zip
>>> bags along with the brine -- just the way that you would do a roast or
>>> a steak. Well, it does fit in the bag and so does brine. But when
>>> you close the bag, half of the turkey sticks up out of the brine.
>>> S**T!!! So. . . I have a big deep bowl, I thought I would put the bird
>>> and brine there --dammit! some of the bird still sticks out of the
>>> brine (did I mention that I am now wearing half the brine and the
>>> counters are awash with it?) I finally decided on a bucket. That
>>> works pretty much o.k., except for a generous Pope's nose up in the
>>> air..
>>> I was so intent on getting the damn turkey brined and refrigerated
>>> that I forgot that my second surgery for my damaged rotator cuff
>>> didn't work either. (means I can't raise my right arm above low
>>> horizontal) How I got that bucket full of bird and brine into the
>>> fridge, I can't remember. I only know that I am off to take a shower
>>> and change clothes and then I will come back and mop the floor.
>>> I had the whole thing planned out in my head. I think that bothers
>>> me more than anything that it didn't work out to plan.
>>> Janet US
>>
>> I'm so sorry for all your troubles Janet, but that whole scene has had
>> me laghing out loud.
>>
>> I hope you can manage to see the humor in it a well !!!!
>
>So do I!!! She had me laughing too!!! I just hope she hasn't done any
>damage to that arm!
>
>--

It is 10 weeks since the last surgery and I have been given the o.k.
to be able to lift things. I'm just very weak all over from not doing
anything since the first week in December. I may get a few more
degrees of mobility in my arm but probably not. When he did the last
surgery he said he couldn't do a complete repair because there wasn't
enough good tissue left to work with. Apparently I really tore up my
shoulder. They are also thinking that 6 years of nutritional
deprivation resulting from radiation treatments has something to do
with it even though those digestive issues have been repaired. It
just takes a couple of years to re-coup and older people, not so much.
Still, I'm alive and kicking ) Thanks for your concern.
Janet US

On 9/27/2012 9:23 PM, Janet Bostwick wrote:

> It is 10 weeks since the last surgery and I have been given the o.k.
> to be able to lift things. I'm just very weak all over from not doing
> anything since the first week in December. I may get a few more
> degrees of mobility in my arm but probably not. When he did the last
> surgery he said he couldn't do a complete repair because there wasn't
> enough good tissue left to work with. Apparently I really tore up my
> shoulder. They are also thinking that 6 years of nutritional
> deprivation resulting from radiation treatments has something to do
> with it even though those digestive issues have been repaired. It
> just takes a couple of years to re-coup and older people, not so much.
> Still, I'm alive and kicking ) Thanks for your concern.

Sometimes I think the result of surgery is worse than what it's intended
to fix. Ok, maybe not worse, but maybe its just a side effect we have
to live with. Since my first spinal fusion surgery and some cleaning
out of bone compressing the nerves in my back (second surgery), I'm left
with what they call a drop foot. It means I don't have the same range
of motion in my ankle and I walk funny. No one has yet said if this is
permanent. My toes don't work properly and my ankle can't extend up.
Down extension is getting better, so I hope with PT this can all be
worked out.

On Thu, 27 Sep 2012 23:56:30 -0400, Cheryl <[email protected]>
wrote:

snip
It means I don't have the same range
>of motion in my ankle and I walk funny. No one has yet said if this is
>permanent. My toes don't work properly and my ankle can't extend up.
>Down extension is getting better, so I hope with PT this can all be
>worked out.
>
The PT part takes a lot of time for just little bits of reward.
Sometimes I get very discouraged. Sometimes I rebel and just won't do
my exercises (that's really adult, huh?) The exercises are very hard
to do for me but ridiculous easy for anyone watching. I am sure you
will experience the same thing. Let's you and I just keep on
trucking. My PT told me this last week that research shows that
improvement can continue to develop for as long as two years. My
cancer surgeon told me that the results from nutritional improvement
will take up to a year to begin to be noticed. That means that you
and I have just started. Chin up, kiddo.
Janet US