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Thread: Good Joke

  1. #1
    Jill Stivens Guest

    Default Good Joke

    A distinguished young woman on a flight from Switzerland asked the
    Priest beside her.

    'Father, may I ask a favor?'
    'Of course. What may I do for you?'

    'Well, I bought an expensive woman's electronic hair dryer for my
    mother's birthday that is unopened and well over the Customs limits,
    and
    I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it
    through Customs for me? Under your robes perhaps?'

    'I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you: I will not lie.'
    'With your honest face, Father, no one will question you.'

    When they got to Customs, she let the priest go ahead of her.
    The official asked, 'Father, do you have anything to declare?'

    'From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to
    declare.'

    The official thought this answer strange, so asked, 'And what do you
    have to declare from your waist to the floor?'

    'I have a marvelous instrument designed to be used on a woman, but
    which
    is, to date, unused.'

    Roaring with laughter, the official said, 'Go ahead, Father.' Next!






  2. #2
    Wayne Boatwright Guest

    Default Re: Good Joke

    On Tue 09 Dec 2008 06:08:01p, Jill Stivens told us...

    > A distinguished young woman on a flight from Switzerland asked the
    > Priest beside her.
    >
    > 'Father, may I ask a favor?'
    > 'Of course. What may I do for you?'
    >
    > 'Well, I bought an expensive woman's electronic hair dryer for my
    > mother's birthday that is unopened and well over the Customs limits,
    > and
    > I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it
    > through Customs for me? Under your robes perhaps?'
    >
    > 'I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you: I will not lie.'
    > 'With your honest face, Father, no one will question you.'
    >
    > When they got to Customs, she let the priest go ahead of her.
    > The official asked, 'Father, do you have anything to declare?'
    >
    > 'From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to
    > declare.'
    >
    > The official thought this answer strange, so asked, 'And what do you
    > have to declare from your waist to the floor?'
    >
    > 'I have a marvelous instrument designed to be used on a woman, but
    > which
    > is, to date, unused.'
    >
    > Roaring with laughter, the official said, 'Go ahead, Father.' Next!


    That's cute!

    --
    Wayne Boatwright
    (correct the spelling of "geemail" to reply)
    ************************************************** **********************
    Date: Tuesday, 12(XII)/09(IX)/08(MMVIII)
    ************************************************** **********************
    Countdown till Christmas Day
    2wks 1dys 5hrs 19mins
    ************************************************** **********************
    Help beautify our dumps. Throw away something pretty.
    ************************************************** **********************


  3. #3
    PeterL Guest

    Default Re: Good Joke

    Wayne Boatwright <[email protected]> wrote in
    news:[email protected] 247:

    > On Tue 09 Dec 2008 06:08:01p, Jill Stivens told us...
    >


    >
    > That's cute!
    >




    Unfortunately Wayne..........

    From: Jill Stivens <bom[email protected]>
    NNTP-Posting-Host: 75.125.166.24


    From: Paul Scarlet <[email protected]>
    NNTP-Posting-Host: 75.125.166.48


    From: Lobotomy <[email protected]>
    Date: Tue, 18 Nov 2008 19:41:31 -0800 (PST)
    NNTP-Posting-Host: 75.125.166.60


    Time to give "bomarang" a Score of -9999 in your Score File, which will
    kill anything it posts before you see it.

    http://xnews.newsguy.com/manual.html#score

    Was it you who showed me how to do it recently??

    Or someone else........ I think it may have been someone else.

    If you decide to go that way and need a hand, just holler :-)

    --
    Peter Lucas
    Brisbane
    Australia


    Simple Simon met a pie man going to the fair.
    Said Simple Simon to the pie man
    'What have u got there?'
    Said the pie man unto Simon
    Pies you dickhead.

  4. #4
    Paul Scarlet Guest

    Default Re: Good Joke

    On Dec 10, 1:25*pm, PeterL <Pet...@brissie.com> wrote:
    > Wayne Boatwright <wayneboatwri...@geemail.com> wrote innews:[email protected] 5.247:
    >
    > > On Tue 09 Dec 2008 06:08:01p, Jill Stivens told us...

    >
    > > That's cute!

    >
    > Unfortunately Wayne..........
    >
    > From: Jill Stivens <bomar...@gmail.com>
    > NNTP-Posting-Host: 75.125.166.24
    >
    > From: Paul Scarlet <paul.scar...@gmail.com>
    > NNTP-Posting-Host: 75.125.166.48
    >
    > From: Lobotomy <bomar...@gmail.com>
    > Date: Tue, 18 Nov 2008 19:41:31 -0800 (PST)
    > NNTP-Posting-Host: 75.125.166.60
    >
    > Time to give "bomarang" a Score of -9999 in your Score File, which will
    > kill anything it posts before you see it.
    >
    > http://xnews.newsguy.com/manual.html#score
    >
    > Was it you who showed me how to do it recently??
    >
    > Or someone else........ I think it may have been someone else.
    >
    > If you decide to go that way and need a hand, just holler :-)


    And who the hell are you to forbid people reading stuff that *YOU*
    don't like, especially stuff about yourself Peter Lucas!
    You the joke in here.
    Been down to your mailbox to collect your $1400 yet? You know the
    bonus *SINGLE* pensioners are entitled to claim and *NOT* double
    incomes no kids (dinks) like yourself. Someone should report you.

    http://www.centrelink.gov.au/interne.../fraud_how.htm

  5. #5
    Wayne Boatwright Guest

    Default Re: Good Joke

    On Tue 09 Dec 2008 07:25:08p, PeterL told us...

    > Wayne Boatwright <[email protected]> wrote in
    > news:[email protected] 247:
    >
    >> On Tue 09 Dec 2008 06:08:01p, Jill Stivens told us...
    >>

    >
    >>
    >> That's cute!
    >>

    >
    >
    >
    > Unfortunately Wayne..........
    >
    > From: Jill Stivens <[email protected]>
    > NNTP-Posting-Host: 75.125.166.24
    >
    >
    > From: Paul Scarlet <[email protected]>
    > NNTP-Posting-Host: 75.125.166.48
    >
    >
    > From: Lobotomy <[email protected]>
    > Date: Tue, 18 Nov 2008 19:41:31 -0800 (PST)
    > NNTP-Posting-Host: 75.125.166.60
    >
    >
    > Time to give "bomarang" a Score of -9999 in your Score File, which will
    > kill anything it posts before you see it.


    Yes, it's time, and I know how.

    > http://xnews.newsguy.com/manual.html#score
    >
    > Was it you who showed me how to do it recently??
    >
    > Or someone else........ I think it may have been someone else.


    Yes, it was someone else, perhaps Blinky? He's quite the Xnews expert. I
    don't remember us discussing it.

    >
    > If you decide to go that way and need a hand, just holler :-)
    >


    No, I'm good, thanks!

    --
    Wayne Boatwright
    (correct the spelling of "geemail" to reply)
    ************************************************** **********************
    Date: Tuesday, 12(XII)/09(IX)/08(MMVIII)
    ************************************************** **********************
    Countdown till Christmas Day
    2wks 1dys 3hrs 29mins
    ************************************************** **********************
    Go on and try it. The worst you can do is make a fool of yourself
    in front of all your friends.
    ************************************************** **********************

  6. #6
    PeterL Guest

    Default Re: Good Joke

    Wayne Boatwright <[email protected]> wrote in
    news:[email protected] 5.247:



    >
    > Yes, it's time, and I know how.



    Cool.

    I'm still learning :-)

    Killing off little bits and pieces at a time.


    --
    Peter Lucas
    Brisbane
    Australia

    ACHTUNG! ALLES LOOKENSPEEPERS! Das computermachine ist nicht fuer
    gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk,
    blowenfusen und poppencorken mit spitzensparken. Ist nicht fuer gewerken
    bei das dumpkopfen. Das rubbernecken sichtseeren keepen das cotten-
    pickenen hans in das pockets muss; relaxen und watchen das
    blinkenlichten

  7. #7
    Wayne Boatwright Guest

    Default Re: Good Joke

    On Tue 09 Dec 2008 08:47:52p, PeterL told us...

    > Wayne Boatwright <[email protected]> wrote in
    > news:[email protected] 5.247:
    >
    >
    >
    >>
    >> Yes, it's time, and I know how.

    >
    >
    > Cool.
    >
    > I'm still learning :-)
    >
    > Killing off little bits and pieces at a time.
    >
    >


    That's the best way. The score file is powerful. Too much and you lose a
    lot.

    --
    Wayne Boatwright
    (correct the spelling of "geemail" to reply)
    ************************************************** **********************
    Date: Tuesday, 12(XII)/09(IX)/08(MMVIII)
    ************************************************** **********************
    Countdown till Christmas Day
    2wks 1dys 3hrs 3mins
    ************************************************** **********************
    Captain, why not just give the Borg Windows? - Worf
    ************************************************** **********************


  8. #8
    PeterL Guest

    Default Re: Good Joke

    Wayne Boatwright <[email protected]> wrote in
    news:[email protected] 5.250:

    > On Tue 09 Dec 2008 08:47:52p, PeterL told us...
    >
    >> Wayne Boatwright <[email protected]> wrote in
    >> news:[email protected] 5.247:
    >>
    >>
    >>
    >>>
    >>> Yes, it's time, and I know how.

    >>
    >>
    >> Cool.
    >>
    >> I'm still learning :-)
    >>
    >> Killing off little bits and pieces at a time.
    >>
    >>

    >
    > That's the best way. The score file is powerful. Too much and you
    > lose a lot.
    >




    LOL!! I found that out pretty quick ;-)



    --
    Peter Lucas
    Brisbane
    Australia

    ACHTUNG! ALLES LOOKENSPEEPERS! Das computermachine ist nicht fuer
    gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk,
    blowenfusen und poppencorken mit spitzensparken. Ist nicht fuer gewerken
    bei das dumpkopfen. Das rubbernecken sichtseeren keepen das cotten-
    pickenen hans in das pockets muss; relaxen und watchen das
    blinkenlichten

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