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Thread: Funny Thanksgiving Stories

  1. #1
    jmcquown Guest

    Default Funny Thanksgiving Stories

    "Let Kroger Do it For You". Or so my mother thought one year. I believe it
    was around 1977. My mother kept seeing ads in the newspaper and on TV, "Let
    Kroger Do it For You", accompanied by a picture of a nicely roasted turkey,
    dressing, mashed potatoes, pumpkin pie, etc. So she called Kroger and told
    them to reserve a dinner for us. She arranged to pick it up around 3PM on
    Thanksgiving day.

    My brother and I went with her to the store to pick it up. He came out
    carrying the box. As he was putting it in the trunk he said, "This box is
    awfully cold." We/she opened it up to find a 12 lb. frozen *uncooked*
    turkey, frozen dressing, frozen everything. (The ad was very misleading.)
    She expected a fully cooked dinner in a box, with maybe only some minor
    reheating necessary.

    My mother wasn't one to lose her temper often, but this time she did! She
    had my brother carry the box back into the store and demanded to speak to
    the manager. She was yelling about false advertising. LOL Yep, Mom could
    be feisty. She got her money back.

    But now we were stuck without a Thanksgiving dinner. Well hell, who says it
    has to be turkey? She promptly drove to another grocery store. We had NY
    strip steaks and baked potatoes for Thanksgiving dinner that year

    Anyone got any funny holiday food memories to share?

    Jill


  2. #2
    Chemo the Clown Guest

    Default Re: Funny Thanksgiving Stories

    On Nov 24, 3:10*pm, "jmcquown" <j_mcqu...@comcast.net> wrote:
    > "Let Kroger Do it For You". *Or so my mother thought one year. *I believe it
    > was around 1977. *My mother kept seeing ads in the newspaper and on TV,"Let
    > Kroger Do it For You", accompanied by a picture of a nicely roasted turkey,
    > dressing, mashed potatoes, pumpkin pie, etc. *So she called Kroger and told
    > them to reserve a dinner for us. *She arranged to pick it up around 3PMon
    > Thanksgiving day.
    >
    > My brother and I went with her to the store to pick it up. *He came out
    > carrying the box. *As he was putting it in the trunk he said, "This boxis
    > awfully cold." *We/she opened it up to find a 12 lb. frozen *uncooked*
    > turkey, frozen dressing, frozen everything. *(The ad was very misleading.)
    > She expected a fully cooked dinner in a box, with maybe only some minor
    > reheating necessary.
    >
    > My mother wasn't one to lose her temper often, but this time she did! *She
    > had my brother carry the box back into the store and demanded to speak to
    > the manager. *She was yelling about false advertising. *LOL *Yep, Mom could
    > be feisty. *She got her money back.
    >
    > But now we were stuck without a Thanksgiving dinner. *Well hell, who says it
    > has to be turkey? *She promptly drove to another grocery store. *We had NY
    > strip steaks and baked potatoes for Thanksgiving dinner that year
    >
    > Anyone got any funny holiday food memories to share?
    >
    > Jill


    One year when I was maybe 9, my folks forgot to buy the turkey. I
    guess my mom thought my dad was going to get it and vice versa.
    So...because the freezer was loaded with fish...we had fish and all
    the trimmings.

  3. #3
    Andy Guest

    Default Re: Funny Thanksgiving Stories

    "jmcquown" <[email protected]> wrote:

    > "Let Kroger Do it For You". Or so my mother thought one year. I
    > believe it was around 1977. My mother kept seeing ads in the
    > newspaper and on TV, "Let Kroger Do it For You", accompanied by a
    > picture of a nicely roasted turkey, dressing, mashed potatoes, pumpkin
    > pie, etc. So she called Kroger and told them to reserve a dinner for
    > us. She arranged to pick it up around 3PM on Thanksgiving day.
    >
    > My brother and I went with her to the store to pick it up. He came
    > out carrying the box. As he was putting it in the trunk he said,
    > "This box is awfully cold." We/she opened it up to find a 12 lb.
    > frozen *uncooked* turkey, frozen dressing, frozen everything. (The ad
    > was very misleading.) She expected a fully cooked dinner in a box,
    > with maybe only some minor reheating necessary.
    >
    > My mother wasn't one to lose her temper often, but this time she did!
    > She had my brother carry the box back into the store and demanded to
    > speak to the manager. She was yelling about false advertising. LOL
    > Yep, Mom could be feisty. She got her money back.
    >
    > But now we were stuck without a Thanksgiving dinner. Well hell, who
    > says it has to be turkey? She promptly drove to another grocery
    > store. We had NY strip steaks and baked potatoes for Thanksgiving
    > dinner that year
    >
    > Anyone got any funny holiday food memories to share?
    >
    > Jill



    Jill,

    That's a half funny/half sad story.

    We all wished we got paid while Pop Pop carved the poor bird!

    Best,

    Andy

  4. #4
    Kalmia Guest

    Default Re: Funny Thanksgiving Stories

    On Nov 24, 6:10*pm, "jmcquown" <j_mcqu...@comcast.net> wrote:
    > "Let Kroger Do it For You". *Or so my mother thought one year. *I believe it
    > was around 1977. *My mother kept seeing ads in the newspaper and on TV,"Let
    > Kroger Do it For You", accompanied by a picture of a nicely roasted turkey,
    > dressing, mashed potatoes, pumpkin pie, etc. *So she called Kroger and told
    > them to reserve a dinner for us. *She arranged to pick it up around 3PMon
    > Thanksgiving day.
    >
    > My brother and I went with her to the store to pick it up. *He came out
    > carrying the box. *As he was putting it in the trunk he said, "This boxis
    > awfully cold." *We/she opened it up to find a 12 lb. frozen *uncooked*
    > turkey, frozen dressing, frozen everything. *(The ad was very misleading.)
    > She expected a fully cooked dinner in a box, with maybe only some minor
    > reheating necessary.
    >
    > My mother wasn't one to lose her temper often, but this time she did! *She
    > had my brother carry the box back into the store and demanded to speak to
    > the manager. *She was yelling about false advertising. *LOL *Yep, Mom could
    > be feisty. *She got her money back.
    >
    > But now we were stuck without a Thanksgiving dinner. *Well hell, who says it
    > has to be turkey? *She promptly drove to another grocery store. *We had NY
    > strip steaks and baked potatoes for Thanksgiving dinner that year
    >
    > Anyone got any funny holiday food memories to share?
    >
    > Jill


    This happened in my office one Xmas. We got everything all set up for
    a big luncheon, two gals went to pick up what they thought would be a
    hot turkey, ready to carve - they were gone forever - came back
    laughing their heads off.

    Yes, very misleading. I don't remember how it was handled, but we
    did finally get a hot, cooked turkey.

  5. #5
    Andy Guest

    Default Re: Funny Thanksgiving Stories

    What was different about The Doors than any other rock'n'roll band?

    Andy

  6. #6
    Julie Bove Guest

    Default Re: Funny Thanksgiving Stories


    "jmcquown" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]..
    > "Let Kroger Do it For You". Or so my mother thought one year. I believe
    > it was around 1977. My mother kept seeing ads in the newspaper and on TV,
    > "Let Kroger Do it For You", accompanied by a picture of a nicely roasted
    > turkey, dressing, mashed potatoes, pumpkin pie, etc. So she called Kroger
    > and told them to reserve a dinner for us. She arranged to pick it up
    > around 3PM on Thanksgiving day.
    >
    > My brother and I went with her to the store to pick it up. He came out
    > carrying the box. As he was putting it in the trunk he said, "This box is
    > awfully cold." We/she opened it up to find a 12 lb. frozen *uncooked*
    > turkey, frozen dressing, frozen everything. (The ad was very misleading.)
    > She expected a fully cooked dinner in a box, with maybe only some minor
    > reheating necessary.
    >
    > My mother wasn't one to lose her temper often, but this time she did! She
    > had my brother carry the box back into the store and demanded to speak to
    > the manager. She was yelling about false advertising. LOL Yep, Mom
    > could be feisty. She got her money back.
    >
    > But now we were stuck without a Thanksgiving dinner. Well hell, who says
    > it has to be turkey? She promptly drove to another grocery store. We had
    > NY strip steaks and baked potatoes for Thanksgiving dinner that year
    >
    > Anyone got any funny holiday food memories to share?


    When we moved to CA, I found a complete dinner that came to you frozen. It
    was supposed to have a boneless turkey breast in it. I thought this was
    great because I have an aversion to things with bones in it.

    To my horror, I discovered that it was a HUGE whole turkey. I had to go out
    and buy a foil roasting pan because my huge splatterware roasting pan just
    wasn't big enough for it.

    I did my best to get it in and out of the oven because the pan was so
    flimsy, it was very clumsy to deal with. And because it took up the entire
    oven, I had to wait until it was fully heated through before I could heat up
    the side dishes of stuffing, mashed potatoes, green bean casserole and
    whatever the dessert was. No rolls came with.

    The bird sat on the top of the stove making a HUGE mess. I had no idea how
    much juice/fat it would give off. The mess got worse as my husband
    attempted to carve it. I wasn't about to do it. Wouldn't know how to do
    it. And apparently he didn't either. He pretty much massacred it and
    stabbed some slits in the foil pan, sending greasy juice all over the top of
    the stove, down the front of the stove and onto the floor below. I was in
    tears because I couldn't clean it up fast enough.

    All of the side dishes turned out to be disgusting. They were loaded with
    all sorts of crap that I would never put in my food. Like soybean oil. It
    was even in the gummy mashed potatoes. Nobody liked them. Nobody liked the
    dessert either. It all went in the trash. And nobody wanted to deal with
    the rest of the turkey. I did save some of the meat which I used the
    following day to make a disgusting Rachel Ray recipe for pizza. Nobody
    liked that either!

    My husband just got mad at the big slippery, greasy turkey and told me to
    throw it out. We were in military housing at the time and the kitchen was
    upstairs. I had to stuff the whole mess in a garbage bag and hope I didn't
    drip grease through the livingroom or on the stairs as I went.

    After that fiasco, if I have to make the food at home... I buy a precooked
    turkey breast or sliced turkey for my daughter and I, and enough legs to fit
    in my large crockpot for my husband. Yeah, I know they have bones but I can
    just sort of plop them in and forget about them. The side dishes and things
    are easy enough to make.

    Now that we are back in WA, we usually have Thanksgiving at their house.
    They bought a complete meal from Boston Market when it was here and a cooked
    one from the grocery store. We weren't pleased with either of them. We're
    all really picky eaters though.



  7. #7
    Julie Bove Guest

    Default Re: Funny Thanksgiving Stories


    "Kalmia" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]..
    On Nov 24, 6:10 pm, "jmcquown" <j_mcqu...@comcast.net> wrote:
    > "Let Kroger Do it For You". Or so my mother thought one year. I believe it
    > was around 1977. My mother kept seeing ads in the newspaper and on TV,
    > "Let
    > Kroger Do it For You", accompanied by a picture of a nicely roasted
    > turkey,
    > dressing, mashed potatoes, pumpkin pie, etc. So she called Kroger and told
    > them to reserve a dinner for us. She arranged to pick it up around 3PM on
    > Thanksgiving day.
    >
    > My brother and I went with her to the store to pick it up. He came out
    > carrying the box. As he was putting it in the trunk he said, "This box is
    > awfully cold." We/she opened it up to find a 12 lb. frozen *uncooked*
    > turkey, frozen dressing, frozen everything. (The ad was very misleading.)
    > She expected a fully cooked dinner in a box, with maybe only some minor
    > reheating necessary.
    >
    > My mother wasn't one to lose her temper often, but this time she did! She
    > had my brother carry the box back into the store and demanded to speak to
    > the manager. She was yelling about false advertising. LOL Yep, Mom could
    > be feisty. She got her money back.
    >
    > But now we were stuck without a Thanksgiving dinner. Well hell, who says
    > it
    > has to be turkey? She promptly drove to another grocery store. We had NY
    > strip steaks and baked potatoes for Thanksgiving dinner that year
    >
    > Anyone got any funny holiday food memories to share?
    >
    > Jill


    This happened in my office one Xmas. We got everything all set up for
    a big luncheon, two gals went to pick up what they thought would be a
    hot turkey, ready to carve - they were gone forever - came back
    laughing their heads off.

    Yes, very misleading. I don't remember how it was handled, but we
    did finally get a hot, cooked turkey.

    This wasn't on Thanksgiving. Might have been Christmas. Not sure. The
    office manager went to pick up an ice cream cake that somebody had ordered.
    It turned out to be a full sheet which was far too large to fit in the
    medium sized fridge that we had in the break room. She freaked and said we
    all had to eat it right then. I know we did have big freezers or at least
    one big freezer in the cafeteria but the cafeteria manager probably wouldn't
    let her use it. She was a real stickler on the "no outside food" rule which
    is actually a health code violation here.



  8. #8
    Omelet Guest

    Default Re: Funny Thanksgiving Stories

    In article <icqdfn$4sd$[email protected]>,
    "Julie Bove" <[email protected]> wrote:

    > Now that we are back in WA, we usually have Thanksgiving at their house.
    > They bought a complete meal from Boston Market when it was here and a cooked
    > one from the grocery store. We weren't pleased with either of them. We're
    > all really picky eaters though.


    <shakes head> Sorry hon', but if you are going to be "picky eaters",
    pre-cooked meals are never going to work. ;-)

    I have, in the past when I was just to busy working more than one job,
    purchased pre-smoked or pre-roasted turkeys and just heated them. They
    were acceptable but too salty. Sides are easy enough, I never bothered
    to cheat with those...

    Later today, I will attempt my first home smoked bird. Intent is to just
    cut it in half down the center instead of spatching it as my smoker is
    just not wide enough.

    I'll roast the yams in the table top roaster, or maybe in the toaster
    oven. Have not decided yet...

    Likely the latter as it lives on the dead glasstop where the other is
    stored in a corner.

    I'm currently baking a Turban squash in the toaster oven seeded and
    stuffed with buttery mashed potatoes. Should be interesting.
    --
    Peace! Om

    Web Albums: <http://picasaweb.google.com/OMPOmelet>
    *Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or
    no influence on society. -- Mark Twain

  9. #9
    Julie Bove Guest

    Default Re: Funny Thanksgiving Stories


    "Omelet" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news[email protected]..
    > In article <icqdfn$4sd$[email protected]>,
    > "Julie Bove" <[email protected]> wrote:
    >
    >> Now that we are back in WA, we usually have Thanksgiving at their house.
    >> They bought a complete meal from Boston Market when it was here and a
    >> cooked
    >> one from the grocery store. We weren't pleased with either of them.
    >> We're
    >> all really picky eaters though.

    >
    > <shakes head> Sorry hon', but if you are going to be "picky eaters",
    > pre-cooked meals are never going to work. ;-)
    >
    > I have, in the past when I was just to busy working more than one job,
    > purchased pre-smoked or pre-roasted turkeys and just heated them. They
    > were acceptable but too salty. Sides are easy enough, I never bothered
    > to cheat with those...
    >
    > Later today, I will attempt my first home smoked bird. Intent is to just
    > cut it in half down the center instead of spatching it as my smoker is
    > just not wide enough.
    >
    > I'll roast the yams in the table top roaster, or maybe in the toaster
    > oven. Have not decided yet...
    >
    > Likely the latter as it lives on the dead glasstop where the other is
    > stored in a corner.
    >
    > I'm currently baking a Turban squash in the toaster oven seeded and
    > stuffed with buttery mashed potatoes. Should be interesting.


    My daughter likes smoked turkey. But I don't. Not sure if my husband likes
    it or not. He really likes the legs. Odd that my mom didn't serve any. I
    assume she got a whole bird. She said it was 22 pounds. Normally she will
    buy extra legs because all the males in the family like them. But she said
    this year everyone at the store were just sort of shell shocked after having
    been snowed in. She said the aisles were terribly crowded. People just
    sort of grabbed stuff and ran. Perhaps they didn't have any legs. When
    I've bought them in the past, I would find two at this store, two at that
    store. No quantity of them anywhere. Except oddly for times other than
    Thanksgiving and when my husband isn't home. I found the best way to cook
    them is in the crockpot with some big pieces of onion and celery that are
    discarded later. Husband didn't like them with BBQ sauce.



  10. #10
    Omelet Guest

    Default Re: Funny Thanksgiving Stories

    In article <icqlhp$i4$[email protected]>,
    "Julie Bove" <[email protected]> wrote:

    > > Later today, I will attempt my first home smoked bird. Intent is to just
    > > cut it in half down the center instead of spatching it as my smoker is
    > > just not wide enough.
    > >
    > > I'll roast the yams in the table top roaster, or maybe in the toaster
    > > oven. Have not decided yet...
    > >
    > > Likely the latter as it lives on the dead glasstop where the other is
    > > stored in a corner.
    > >
    > > I'm currently baking a Turban squash in the toaster oven seeded and
    > > stuffed with buttery mashed potatoes. Should be interesting.

    >
    > My daughter likes smoked turkey. But I don't. Not sure if my husband likes
    > it or not. He really likes the legs. Odd that my mom didn't serve any. I
    > assume she got a whole bird. She said it was 22 pounds. Normally she will
    > buy extra legs because all the males in the family like them.


    It's a "guy thing". Think "caveman" <g>

    Or Fred Flintstone...


    > But she said
    > this year everyone at the store were just sort of shell shocked after having
    > been snowed in. She said the aisles were terribly crowded. People just
    > sort of grabbed stuff and ran. Perhaps they didn't have any legs. When
    > I've bought them in the past, I would find two at this store, two at that
    > store. No quantity of them anywhere. Except oddly for times other than
    > Thanksgiving and when my husband isn't home.


    I actually prefer wings and they (unlike chicken wings) are inexpensive
    at the moment due to current harvest demands. Cut the Drummets. They are
    still huge!

    > I found the best way to cook
    > them is in the crockpot with some big pieces of onion and celery that are
    > discarded later. Husband didn't like them with BBQ sauce.


    Just roast then without a fancy sauce perhaps?
    They are good that way. :-)

    Turkey is cheap cheap cheap this time of year. Best (imho) to stock up
    on a whole one (or two or three) and cut them up for parts, then cook
    them as you like the rest of the year for single meals.

    Whatever works!

    Cheap meat is cheap meat, and both dad and I actually LIKE turkey! There
    are many that don't.
    --
    Peace! Om

    Web Albums: <http://picasaweb.google.com/OMPOmelet>
    *Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or
    no influence on society. -- Mark Twain

  11. #11
    Julie Bove Guest

    Default Re: Funny Thanksgiving Stories


    "Omelet" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news[email protected]..
    > In article <icqlhp$i4$[email protected]>,
    > "Julie Bove" <[email protected]> wrote:
    >
    >> > Later today, I will attempt my first home smoked bird. Intent is to
    >> > just
    >> > cut it in half down the center instead of spatching it as my smoker is
    >> > just not wide enough.
    >> >
    >> > I'll roast the yams in the table top roaster, or maybe in the toaster
    >> > oven. Have not decided yet...
    >> >
    >> > Likely the latter as it lives on the dead glasstop where the other is
    >> > stored in a corner.
    >> >
    >> > I'm currently baking a Turban squash in the toaster oven seeded and
    >> > stuffed with buttery mashed potatoes. Should be interesting.

    >>
    >> My daughter likes smoked turkey. But I don't. Not sure if my husband
    >> likes
    >> it or not. He really likes the legs. Odd that my mom didn't serve any.
    >> I
    >> assume she got a whole bird. She said it was 22 pounds. Normally she
    >> will
    >> buy extra legs because all the males in the family like them.

    >
    > It's a "guy thing". Think "caveman" <g>
    >
    > Or Fred Flintstone...
    >
    >
    >> But she said
    >> this year everyone at the store were just sort of shell shocked after
    >> having
    >> been snowed in. She said the aisles were terribly crowded. People just
    >> sort of grabbed stuff and ran. Perhaps they didn't have any legs. When
    >> I've bought them in the past, I would find two at this store, two at that
    >> store. No quantity of them anywhere. Except oddly for times other than
    >> Thanksgiving and when my husband isn't home.

    >
    > I actually prefer wings and they (unlike chicken wings) are inexpensive
    > at the moment due to current harvest demands. Cut the Drummets. They are
    > still huge!
    >
    >> I found the best way to cook
    >> them is in the crockpot with some big pieces of onion and celery that are
    >> discarded later. Husband didn't like them with BBQ sauce.

    >
    > Just roast then without a fancy sauce perhaps?
    > They are good that way. :-)
    >
    > Turkey is cheap cheap cheap this time of year. Best (imho) to stock up
    > on a whole one (or two or three) and cut them up for parts, then cook
    > them as you like the rest of the year for single meals.
    >
    > Whatever works!
    >
    > Cheap meat is cheap meat, and both dad and I actually LIKE turkey! There
    > are many that don't.


    I am one who does not. I can eat it as in a Thanksgiving dinner or an
    occasional sandwich. But I do not like it in other foods like salad, soup
    or enchiladas. Or especially Rachel Ray's pizza!



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